Little Things She “Really” Wants
May 28, 2008
I got this from a Yahoo article on what guys can do for women to show they care. Yup. So I was interested to see your thoughts on these ‘tips’. Agree? Disagree? Would you add anything else?
It’s not the big things that make her happy; it’s paying attention to the little details and showing you care that is really meaningful. She doesn’t necessarily need lavish gifts — she needs to know you’re thinking about her.
Here are some ideas to get you started doing these “little things” she really wants:
1. Rub her feet instead of asking her if she wants you to rub her feet. Make it look like you want to do it.
2. Make her dinner one night. Don’t ask her if she wants you to make dinner. Make her dinner before she gets home.
3. Light a candle so that she arrives home to a nice environment instead of coming home to the glaring lights of the television and other things.
4. Send her a text in the middle of the day telling her “I miss your smile from this morning” or “Last night was amazing!” or “The conversation we had last night was great.
5. Send an eCard in the middle of the day… something cute to remind her how much you really care about her.
6. If she’s going on a business trip, offer to drive her to the airport or pick her up to make her life that much easier.
7. Let her have control of the remote control. Don’t monopolize it for a change. Just give it to her and let her actually sit there and enjoying watching one of her shows. Then you can share one of her interests by watching it with her.
8. Offer to iron one of her shirts or take her clothes to the dry cleaner.
9. Clean up the bathroom without being asked. Don’t just sit there and ignore the mess around the toilet. If you know it drives her crazy to see water splashed all around the sink, dry that area after you use it.
10. If you work out together, enjoy it with her instead of rushing through your own workout and then not letting her workout at the same time.
11. Take a shower together, then wash her hair, scrub her back, and give her a spa treatment. Do this and enjoy it!
12. The next time she gives you a massage, give her a massage the next day. Offer it! Don’t just say you’ll give her a massage…do it!
13. Surprise her by making plans. Tell her, “We’re going out tonight honey.” You can even just go out for a drink or dinner somewhere. It’s taking the initiative that’s important.
14. Decide on and set aside one night a week as date night. Have a date like when you first started dating.
15. Call her in the middle of the day and just say hello. Don’t wait for her to call you.
Uh. Tip 11? Seriously. šÆ
inProgress 
11 = YES
Another addition is something I did last night but don’t do often enough… fill up her car with gas.
wow…11 would not go over well at home…but i really like #14, we have been trying to do that lately and it has been a big help in keeping stress levels down and communication lines open!!!
Don’t do them all in one day should be added. I like #13. #9 – YES! Toliet stuff grosses me out!
I am a spoiled rotten brat! I almost feel bad about it. naaaaaaaa I am smiling because my hubs does all this stuff for me, and it was not always this way, but we work at it and it is amazing how far the little things go! And for those of you who didn’t like # 11 try it you’ll like it! š
HA! I get most of these from my hubby now…but he could definitely get better at 1, 2, & 3. Just emailed him this blog post.
Here’s one that wasn’t on the list:
when throwing your dirty underwear accross the room, be sure to ask her to duck first. – Now that is LOVE!
Judy Free- HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHHA
š
side. hurting. laughing. hard.
Big yes on number 11. Jer is quite the romantic and often surprises me with these types of things. š He makes life fun and after 13 years of marriage we still date and surpise eachother with little things like this. 11, is definately at the top of the list! š
In reading number 4, it was a reminder to me that…I have to smile so he’ll miss it, I need to make last night amazing so he’ll think it was amazing…and I have to make time for conversation so he’ll think our talk was great!…..
OH MY! But that brought back memories! And what memories they were!
But they forgot poems and her favorite flowers–given NOT to “make up,” but just given. Totally random.
And blindfolds and baby oil.
(And that’s all I’m saying about that. šÆ )
I should really stop typing now, but…
Oh. Yeah. And “Earl Grey.” They forgot “Earl Grey.” š
(Sorry. That’s a secret, too. š )
Not to mention 15 words a man can say to make a marriage work:
1. I love you.
2. You look great.
3. Can I help?
4. It’s my fault.
5. Let’s eat out.
(List courtesy of Dear Abby! š )
Oh, those days! Those days! OH MY Those Days!!!
I think if men AND women followed all of those tips and were concerned about their spouse’s needs/wants more than their own…our divorce rate would drop dramatically.
But…what do I know? I’m single:)
Here is my #11 issue(s)
I absolutely LOVE my private time. The shower and all potty moments are my private time.
And. the two people in the shower thing just doesn’t work. someone’s always cold without any warm water streaming down their exposed lil bodies.
AND, men…can you really do any of these things w/out the BIG thing in mind??? Can it be done w/out ulterior motive? Not that that’s bad š at all š but how often can you do these things with the intention of just wanting to do something nice?
The ulterior motive is about the nicest thing i can think of……. š He would have to worry about ME being the one to just let him #11 me without an ulterior motive! š
šÆ
ahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa!
k, so i’m eating a banana and it got me thinking about ‘mating’…my issue w/11 isn’t whether or not ‘that’ takes place (we’ve got almost 17 yrs of lessons under our belts – we’re doin more than fine there š ) it’s, can it be done with the guys initiative w/out that intent?
hold the phone. i just answered my own question
nothing a guy does is w/out “that” in mind.
silly me
š
AAHAHAHAH!!!
I was TOTALLY thinking the same thing about #11….. uhhh, no thanks!! šÆ That one was just weird.
And no, NOTHING a guy does is without that in mind. Seriously.
And you see nothing wrong with eating a bananna and thinking about mating???? šÆ This is too hysterical….. š
And Deb! šÆ
HAHA!! š
Deb, I was thinking the same thing about the banana and mating…… WOW!!! šÆ
Brent will read that and think “I trained her well” š
oopsies
oh Tam, this is too much! You have got me laughing hard this morning. Yah, #11….come on. now a bath on the other hand….
how about him taking me on a date to one of the first places we kissed….only this time he said “with no curfew, and no restrictions.” That is his plan for tonight…..under the canopy of his truck, in sleeping bag (s) watching the stars and…..holding hands. tee hee!
love, Storie
I could write a fictional story about a guy with no ulterior motives in mind with any of the items listed. Even number 11. But I don’t think anyone would buy it. Not even Lifetime.
Can we reword # 1. “Make it look like you want to do it.” ==> “Enjoy bringing her relief and let her see that.”
And yes NorEaster! Write a poem.
Plus take walks. Hold hands.
And while in the shower let her have 90% of the water. I mean get real, your not in there for the shower.
Ric- š
Storie – you’re such a romantic š We need to get URL linked here. We can’t get to your blog š¦
thank you Ric for proving my point~
I know it, kind of mushy, huh?
Then there was the 10 days of anniversary he did on our 10th year…(almost 9 years ago!)
He investigated what each year represented: paper, cotton, wood etc., and each day he gave me a corresponding gift with a poem attached. Believe me he was not a romantic when we first married. That has come after living with a sensitive romantic for 19 years! But he has been willing to meet in the middle!
As far as the blog URL, is there anything I can do from my end to make a difference?
I am so blog-illiterate, but I am hoping to get up to speed.
bananas and mating and # 11… šÆ
love you all..you made my day!
Ok, now…….I feel like guys are getting a bit of a bashing here so it’s my turn to weigh in. Let me say, unequivocally, that I am perfectly capable of showing my wife that I love her without the deed being in mind. I often do things like those listed for my wife just because and not because I have an ulterior motive. Now, I admit, showering with her or giving her a massage makes it more DIFFICULT to set aside ulterior motives but it CAN be done. To me, showing my love for my wife in these ways with an underlying motive cheapens the value of the gesture. So….
GUYS: Do these things for your wives with NO expectation that it will lead to doing the nasty. Do them for no other reason than showing that you love and value them.
GIRLS: Stop assuming that there’s an ulterior motive to your man doing something nice. Cuz nothing kills the desire to do those things quicker than having our reasons questioned.
And, Tam – you have successfully ruined bananas for me….forever! šÆ
16. Flush the frigging toilet after you dropped off a few monster turds!
17. Put the shoes IN the closet, not BY the closet!
(18. It places the lotion in the basket.)
Storie – i think you need to put your whole address in when you sign in…i think…
like http://therealstorie.wordpress.com
try that!
and girl – you and Sean have the romance DOWN!!! you go girl!
GMJ – I’m sorry. I almost grabbed a melon instead. that would’ve been better? š
“monster turds”
oh Mandy is gonna LOVE this post!
Thank you Selena!!! š
Did I do it right? š
dude…
ok, I think I got it.:–)
Storie
I think there were a few steps left out of step 11… š
Storie – it still isn’t working š¦
can someone help storie get her name linked to her blog???
Brian – i don’t think so š
Storie, Go to your profile and change primary blog.
so sorry Tam for being a bother! One more try here. http, not www?
For the record, showering with the wife has never and shall never involve washing her hair.
Period. The end.
Wow – I don’t even know what to add to this discussion!
me either jenni!
šÆ
Tam,
I agree..sometimes a mom just needs her shower.
I think making plans is a big one!
Just flush and I am happy…
When it says “do this and enjoy it” does it mean by doing this you will enjoy what comes later or enjoy giving her the spa treatment?
@Jon
My wife and I usually designate Wednesday as date night. That is the day the dog is worn out from his day camp. I love Wednesdays
Thank you Selena. I think I got it!:-) I at least hope!
Storie
Aww, Tam. It is posts like this that makes me miss being married.
I missed doing all of these things.
Anyways….
#1 is awesome.
Sit down to next her and tell her (with a smile), “Gimme your feet, woman.”
āGimme your feet, woman.ā
Now THAT is AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!
Storie – you did it!!!! Yay!!
now everyone go visit therealstorie!
Hmmnn…I think I just figured out a WW question. š
I LOVE number 9…of course I do live with 4 boys and our bathrooms are always the pits….
Maybe #16 should be
Aim Better!
HAHA Brandi – “Aim Better!” implies they’re trying to aim in the first place.
it sure doesn’t look like that šÆ
Wow.. laughter is the best medicine!!!
I am feeling lots better thanks Tam!!
Taking a shower together is for the birds!!! My bum always gets cold. Cannot have a cold bum ya know?!!
K…all i’m gonna say is don’t knock #11 till y’all have tried it.
done. š
The bathroom in the new house only has a single shower. =/ It doesn’t work too well. We have to borrow the kids’ bathroom which is decorated w/ Disney Princess. It’s hard to get into it when you’re being judged by Cindy, Aurora & Belle….with all their perfect bodies and such.
Draw beards on Snow- MISS -THANG -White. Never like that broad.
oooooo….Selena’s got some Snow White issues…ya might want to chat with Dr. Mickey about that….
i mean Dr. Phil..sheesh…Disney on the brain!
yay heidi – im glad you’re feeling better. and keep that booty warm!
lori – not knockin it. i promise. best tried in a luxurious hotel with dual shower heads. and that’s all i’m saying š
Mandy – aaaaahahahahahahhaaa! HA!!!
Oh…and hair washing during #11…a must, just a must!
LOL @ Lori š
Dr. Phil can kiss my left…
J/k š
Ok, now i’m done š
the whole disney thing would be difficult cuz then i’d have Disney tunes in my head the whole time….like this one from Snow White…The Washing Song…
Step up to the tub
It ain’t no disgrace
Just pull up your sleeves
And get up in place
Then scoop up the water
And rub it on your face
An’ go blud-dle-ud-dle-ud-dle
Ud-dle-um-dum
Pick up the soap
Now don’t try to to bluff
Work up a lather
An’ when ya got enough
Get your hands full of water
Ya snort an ya snuff
An’ go blud-dle-ud-dle-ud-dle
Ud-dle-um-dum
Ya douse an souse
Ya rub and scrub
Ya sputter and splash all over the tub
You may be cold and wet when your done
But ya gotta admit it’s goot clean fun
So splash all ya like
It ain’t any trick
As soon as your through
You’ll feel mighty slick
Bunch of old nanny goats
Ya make me sick, goin’
An’ go blud-dle-ud-dle-ud-dle
Ud-dle-um-dum
Now scrub good an’ hard
It can’t be denied
That he’ll look mighty cute
As soon as he’s dried
Well it’s good for the soul
And it’s good for the hide
To go blud-dle-ud-dle-ud-dle
Ud-dle-um-dum
somebody pick me up off the floor cuz I’m down here laughing my butt off!!!
šÆ
…….still laughing….still on the floor
girl, you’re gonna get fired! are you at work?
Next thing your are going to be singing the ompa lumpa song!!
Oh I can just imagine.
It’s tough reading this in my office without everyone looking. I think I snorted twice already š
But I am smiling and totally addicted to this post!! š
Shhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah Lori, if we get fired, we’ll just move in with Tam!!!
you never know what’s gonna go down here each day.
hopefully it’s not the bar of soap.
im just sayin’
Or a hair mass plugs the tub!!
You know what?
What’s worse in a romantic interlude in the shower, do you ever look at the grout and wonder, I bet a good toothbrush would get that!! š
that was me hitting the floor again! Dang…i gotta quit doin this!
I definitely think a guy slipped in #11…that one rocks š
wow Heidi – that’s like looking in to my brain right there šÆ
B – a guy wrote the whole thing! #11 is not the only one that applies buster!!!!
Good Brains….. š
Giant Idiot said,
“Does the WaxyOne have bad aim?”
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
It’s Wednesday.
And Wednesday is Business time1
Thanks for the link Steven. I love those guys
“Business hours are over Baby!”
I love this list. They’re all good! I already get the foot massages, cooking breakfast, & the showers (with no plans for more action – hope, of course, but no plans).
# next – set up babysitting for night out
Are those business socks you’ve got on?? Definitely watch the video posted by steven.russell with your spouse, if you have one. We’ve gotten miles of laughs out of it!
Not yet baby!!! 4 1/2 more LONG and TEDIOUS hours!!
I think maybe it’s a little past my bedtime.
oh.
my.
gosh.
in the event that anyone is still discussing the original list, #13 is the one that would really speak to me. š #11???!?!?!?? I’m with tam. Alone Time.
Man I don’t remember anything romantic with a shower since having a child. I’d welcome that one with my hubby if I weren’t afraid of a 5 year old poppin his head in saying, “Whatcha doing mommy!”
I sit when I pee every single morning when I get up.
I’m just saying.
@mudpuppy when are you going to include the members of ĪĪĪ© in a blogroll?
@Giant Idiot: Are you not on there yet?
Dang. I swear I’m the worst blogroller in the world. I always RSS but forget to add to the roll….
@mud I am just trying to get in double digits on technorati. So it is for selfish reasons I ask.
@Giant Idiot: It’s fixed now. Totally my bad!
Now back to the bathroom conversation…
I feel like the lady in WalMart who is standing one ilse over giggling at the conversations she hears. š
you forgot the legendary video card!!!
[oh, and I’d like the title better as: little things she “really” wants] š
stegall – video card?
I am keeping my mouth shut on that one! :X
i’ll change it right now. just for you stegall š
Don’t deny us your obvious wit.
i’d love it if my hubs did #4.
oh i have a bikini wax story that would make you cringe!
wow, leave you kids alone for a couple hours we are talking about bikini wax now! sheesh !! I can’t keep up..some how I think the bikini wax falls under a different post on “little things for him” just saying š
dang straight!
Darla – it has gone out of control! You can’t leave me like this ever again!!!
Lece – do you need to email me your story??? š
Nice Lori š Well done!
i just might need to do that!
Tam, after she emails it to you, blog about it. I wanna know!
š
i might need to keep it safely tucked away in the alece-vault then!
Heheh, I don’t NEED to know. š
š
Bikini wax… šÆ OW! or so I’ve heard….ahem…. š
I think I’ll print the list out, hang it on the fridge, and leave little notes like… “I’ll take a number one please, with a side of four” or “eights lookin’ good today babe, and I’ll take a number 11, heavy on the oil….. ” š
@Deb- great idea, then I can choose what #’s i feel like today… YAY! oh no! does that mean that I am control freaking again?? is there any chance that there is a just a small part of submission that requires me to control freak? dang! and I do it so well ! š
Tam I am trying to not leave you alone…but honestly
I ♥ you!
am i the only one who can’t see the “heart”? all i see is a straight bold line š¦
There’s a pretty heart there!!!
Man this conversation got a wee pee interesting!! š
I can see it! bummer!
Hi Tam! I figured since I chat with you on Monday’s I’d stop by and check out your blog and I guess I hit it on a good day! What a great post and the comments – I’ve been laughing since I started reading! Everything on the list looks good to me (but that’s what happens when your man is out of the country) – but I totally agree, i’m not feeling #11!!!
& I like the idea of the bikini wax falling under a different post on ālittle things for himā – that was a good one!:)
Can you see it on other’s posts? š
♥
ā„
♥
Do you see any of the above as hearts?
nope
š¦
maybe i’m heartless.
oh no!
im heartless!!!
breathe tam.
BREATHE!!!!
You’re a sweet heart š
I have to admit I am spoiled in a few of these things. My hubby loves rubbing my feet and always asks me if I want him to when I’m tired. And he cooks when I’ve had a long day without me even saying anything. In fact he asks me what I want to eat!
I think my hubby would think 3,4, and 5 are so “cliche” and corny but I would love it if he did those things occasionally. He’s very anti-television-romance if that makes any sense?
He always drives me to the airport because we share a car HA!
And remote control…hmmm…in all fairness, I really don’t care for television all that much. Now the computer……….there should probably be a reverse one for me not monopolizing the computer and letting him use it šÆ
Aww I feel so bad, I’m always asking my husband to do romantic things and he’s quite the romantic according to this list. He loves to iron and he cleans the bathroom when it’s the day to clean around. And he does a wonderful job too *clap clap*
Hmmm this is turning out to be a running commentary on all the numbers. SORRY. I am monopolizing your comments.
I definitely wish for more surprise dates and stuff. My husband is a much more let’s plan this together type person and wants to know where I want to go or what I want incase his surprise doesn’t turn out accurate. Whereas I LOVE surprises and the thought put into them. Hmmmm…maybe I should email him the link to this post with all its comments…..
LOVE YOU TAM! Thanks for enduring my overly-long comment.
Selena – š awww!
Les – i love your comments! Seems like most the other men who commented, or were commented about, were really only interested in tip #11. So your groom gets the…
Mac Daddy Romance Award!!
***APPLAUSE***
AWWWWW I just told him the deal and he said “ah thank you” and had this huge baby-who-just-got-some-candy-grin on his face.
I think he’ll agree to come to Oregon now YIPEEEEEEEEEEEE
yay!!!! i’ll get your room ready!!!
I’m starting a video card trading group
there are tons of card trading groups out there…
I’m consulting hallmark now!
#7… The Remote Controllll???
( in best Chuck Heston (God rest his soul) voice):” From my cold, Dead HAND!!!”
There are some places a man just cannot go!
Add: Always keep a large economy pack of Oreo’s hidden for ’emergencies’!
Add: Help her redesign her blog when she drops subtle(?) hints.
Add: remind her of the ways she is truly beautiful, the things she does SO well and why you Love her so much, as often as you possibly can. Some women just don’t ‘get’ those things unless someone else reminds them often enough!?
It’s all about reassurance of doubt people!
There are others but time is limited atm.
<B
My husband does most of those things plus laundry!
Re #1: his words…”Give me a hoof”
I know I’m way late to this discussion but there are some obvious clarifications that need to be made. Apparently, the woman I live with @brandiandboys thinks I have bad aim. For the record I only miss at 2am in the morning and I think this is excusable.
We did catch Jett the night before last in the middle of the night peeing down the staircase. He was totally asleep! Now that is bad aim.
Sorry babe, but this just cost you #11!
Mmama and I made this list! Well, most of them! The one thing that we like most is the “touching” – anytime any place – we love to be with each other!
@cathi stegall – When you first mentioned ‘video cards’ yesterday I thought of dual nVidia SLI GPU GeForceĀ® GX2-based graphics cards… and I was thinking, “Man, Mr. Cathi Stegall is sooo lucky!”
Then I thought, “I hate him.” So your comment this morning went a long way in restoring our relationship. Thanks.
Fart less. Cry more. That would make me happy.
Oh, and I can’t believe my pastor and his wife come over to your blog to make cases for and against #11. Too funny!
stegall’s such an entrepreneur!
Love – i’m thinking you should definitely make your own list. I’ like!
Joni – “Give me a hoof!” Hahahahaha!!! Not quite as romantice as Joe Louthan “Sit down to next to her and tell her (with a smile), āGimme your feet, woman.ā š
Pete – Peeing down the staircase!?!?! š Wow! I’m sure that was messy but could you imagine if he tried peeing UP the staircase šÆ
Papa – Brent and I LOVE being with eachother too. He’s my gift!!
Ric – š Phew!
Melissa – AMEN!!! Fart less for Pete’s sake! (not YOU Pete) And I suppose if you wanta know anything else about your Pastor and his family you and I should connect and I’ll bait’em over here š
So I have to tell this somewhere, and if I put in on my own blog I know my mother in law and my mom would blush badly when I explained #11….
#11….. all Jake did was make my hair into soapy hair sculptures. š šÆ
He gave me HORNS!! And then tried to give me dog ears and even growled like a dog. šÆ
Seriously. And the worst part….I was CRACKING up the whole time b/c I SOOOOO knew this was going on a blog somewhere!!! š
Jake actually makes sounds šÆ