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cursing, cussing, swearing, potty mouth, what the &%$#@!

July 9, 2008

for the last day we have been discussing “bad language”

most of it has been light hearted and funny. a couple comments have asked, “is cursing wrong?

then selena asked this…

“Is it in the bible that we can’t say curse words? Is saying “holy smoke” when you are seething with anger any better than saying holy sh!T? I am not being a smarty pants, I seriously have wondered about this.”

so

discuss….

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119 Comments leave one →
  1. July 9, 2008 11:35 am

    I like what Mudpuppy said earlier:

    I ran across a quote today that I just loved involving swear words…

    “I have three things I’d like to say today. First, while you were sleeping last night, 30,000 kids died of starvation or diseases related to malnutrition. Second, most of you don’t give a shit. What’s worse is that you’re more upset with the fact that I said shit than the fact that 30,000 kids died last night.” –Tony Campolo

  2. July 9, 2008 11:37 am

    Is it in the bible…. Tam.. Everything is in the bible remember.

    Proverbs 10:31
    The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but a perverse tongue will be cut out

    Ephesians 4:29
    Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

    So ask yourself.. Does cussing impart wisdom, and is it helpful to those who hear it?

    The way I look at it, it ads nothing to any conversation, and I can express anger and frustration with out cuss words.

  3. July 9, 2008 11:42 am

    A couple of weeks ago, my son told me that he got in trouble for saying, “holy crap.” A kid was jumping around and almost landed on his head and he said, “HOLY CRAP!” An adult responded, “YOU THINK GOD IS CRAP?!?!?!”

    So I told Levi, the next time a kid is about to physically jump on your head respond like this, “that would be swell if you jumped on my head! Jesus loves you!”

    Levi asked, “Wouldn’t a grown adult know that I don’t think God is crap, otherwise I would not even go to church…”

  4. July 9, 2008 11:42 am

    I believe that words are just words, and what significance we put on them as a culture really has no relevence to faith. When it *is* a problem, is when our language gets in the way of the message. Someone might hear me talking about Christ and then hear me drop an F-Bomb, and then perhaps question my truth about God. Sure, it is just a word, and it is my right to say it, but if even one person can be offended, is it worth the cost?

    I am perhaps the worst person to talk about this, as this is a weakness for me (Although I have gotten IMMEASURABLY better.) I do however, still have a bit of a colorful tongue. Does God care, probably not… until my words get in the way of someones faith or salvation, then I really do believe it is a big problem.

  5. July 9, 2008 11:43 am

    perverse can mean different things to different people. i need to look at how the bible defines that word in the context in which you gave. and thanks for providing the Word here!

    i like what Compolo says tho…we get uptight over the little things while we sit back and never bat an eyelash over bigger world issues.

  6. July 9, 2008 11:48 am

    wow selena! to me, the adult was out of line more than the child. you may see me get inpatient on the road while i drive…does that mean i do not love my brothers and sisters int he cars around me. would it be fair to suggest or imply that.

    i agree mocha – a word is a word is a word. it is a heart issue. i know some foul mouth people who love the Lord passionately…who are recovering addicts with many more pressing issues in their lives. they are some of the ones i respect mostly in my life.

  7. July 9, 2008 11:50 am

    CKroboth:

    Are these verses talking about saying, “Holy Smoke, Crap, or Dang it” when you stub your toe or about being manipulative and slanderous to people – verbally destroying an idea and dream an intention, etc.

    When I am excited about a new idea and someone wants to quickly attack it with every reason why it could never work, just being a kill joy, I think of the verses you mentioned.

    Also, when someone gossips and slanders and causes division I think of this:

    Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
    Ephesians 4:29

  8. July 9, 2008 11:50 am

    Awww tam, that is sweet… you’re making me blush. Errr belch.

  9. July 9, 2008 11:57 am

    mocha – youre weird

    selena – i agree with you here.

  10. Amy permalink
    July 9, 2008 11:58 am

    I never ever curse ever. Not even slips. I don’t think that this makes me any better then someone who does it everyday. It’s just something I can’t let myself start doing or I think I’d make it a habit. I believe it’s where your heart is at. I also agree with Mocha. I would hate for something I did to make some else stumble. Dc Talk has a song and the beginning says something about the biggest reason people don’t believe is Christians who profess him with their mouths and deny him with their life style. That has always stuck with me.

  11. July 9, 2008 12:07 pm

    How is being real keeping people from salvation, when the gospel of salvation is he loves real, imperfect people and he wants us to do the same?

    When Jesus asked God, “why?” as in “Why have you forsaken me?” He was being real. I love that.

  12. July 9, 2008 12:07 pm

    My granny has always said she’d rather hear the real thing than hear someone try and cover it up with stupid slang. Like friggin or freakin….which we are masters of in our house. And crap. Crap is a big one in our house too. 😳

    However, I prefer all the funny stuff you can think up to “stand in” for swearing. My hearts intention isn’t to swear, but sometimes, you just need some sort of expletive, y/k?

    fricken fracken!
    biscuit eater!
    Good night!!
    Good grief!
    what the honk?!
    arse!

    I will admit though 😳 that there is one particular swear word that seeps out…. the shizz. Only, not shizz, but…well, you know. I grew up hearing that word as much as I heard “uh-oh.” That’s one I really need to curb.

    But no, I see no problem with “slang” except for maybe friggin…. b/c it’s really close to the F-bomb….which makes my stomach turn.

  13. July 9, 2008 12:09 pm

    “what the honk?!”

    ROTFL

  14. July 9, 2008 12:14 pm

    I think cursing is something we have made taboo.

    This has always been something I have wondered about.

    We have also made certain sins more sinful than others.

    Gluttony, Lying are issues that take place in the church and are almost never addressed.

    It is like the “how to worship” argument.

    I honestly wonder if God rolls his eyes at us sometimes over the stuff that we waste our time on while the rest of the world goes to hell in a handbasket.

    Oh crap. Should I have said heck in a handbasket?

  15. July 9, 2008 12:15 pm

    Oh, I also like beyotch. I say that one a lot. I like it.

    Selena: honk honk. 😆

  16. July 9, 2008 12:16 pm

    I don’t cuss, but my mom and dad who are amazing Christian people and my grandparents also say “sh*t”

    They were raised in the country. That is the correct term for “poo”.

    So now, I don’t think that’s a curse word when used like that. If you say a word (ANY WORD) out of bitterness or anger in your heart or to initentially hurt someone, then that’s cursing – it’s not the specific word – it’s the heart!

  17. July 9, 2008 12:19 pm

    I have a good story about slang actually….

    I call the boys “Buggers” all the time. It’s my “pet name” for them. I told Love one night that I call them buggers and he seemed shocked. He proceeded to tell me what “buggers” means in Australia. 😯 Hardly able to believe this, I looked it up on dictionary.com. Sure enough, I’ve been calling my babies sodomizers. But was that my intention? Nope. Do I still call them buggers? You bet. 😀

  18. July 9, 2008 12:24 pm

    If it doesn’t feel right, I don’t say it. If it slips (very rarely) and I find myself feeling yucky for it, I usually apologize. I just feel most curse words are unnecessary….and yes society has made them what they are….but we are society….and unless we can attach some kind meaning to bad words, they will probably always be “bad”. And I agree wholeheartedly that if I were to use a “bad” word in the presence of someone who was observing me and my otherwise consistent actions/words of faith….I might severely obstruct their view of Jesus within me. I never want to be guilty of that… but when i stump my toe…..it just flies…..and i usually beg apology. : ) I’m loving “honk”…that might be my new one.

  19. July 9, 2008 12:32 pm

    Honk came from my sister in law a long time ago! I love it!

  20. July 9, 2008 12:34 pm

    But if you say honk and know you are using it in place of the “real” word and the people around you know it as well, what is the difference.

    Just to make YOU feel better about YOURSELF?

    Me. I curse.

    Not often. But occasionally.

    And I am not making excuses for it.

    I lie, too.

    And sometimes eat too much. So I guess I am a glutton.

    But know what.

    Jesus still loves me.

  21. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 12:37 pm

    “But I say to you, that every idle word that men may speak, they shall give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Mat. 12:36-37
    “Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded, in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility, sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be shamed, having nothing evil to say of you.” Titus 2:5-7
    “A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart brings forth evil. For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” Luke 6:45
    Whatever the abundance is in ones heart, is what comes out. I think again, it is do we want to conform to what God’s Word says, or conform Him to us..
    Unfortunately, it is accepted nowadays and even cool to swear up a storm….I slip, everyone does, but I still feel the “ick” when I do, so to me it’s something that doesn’t really edify my walk or set a great example to others around me. That and the over 126 verses in Gods Word that deal with the tongue… 🙄

  22. July 9, 2008 12:38 pm

    steven – amen

  23. July 9, 2008 12:40 pm

    Just to make me feel better about myself? Wow.

    Yes. I swear. Shit and bitch and two of my favorites. Do I do it in public? NO.

    Why do I say “what the honk?” instead of “what the hell?” To show some discression. My four year old doesn’t know honk is a stand in for hell or shoot is a stand in for shit.

  24. July 9, 2008 12:40 pm

    I dont have any problems with most cuss words, but calling someone “weird” is just over the line… fighting words… salvation-sacrificing audacity if you ask me. There’s a line in the sand, and I just drew it…

  25. July 9, 2008 12:54 pm

    I didn’t mean you. Personally.

    I mean people as a whole.

  26. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 12:55 pm

    Just to be the devil’s advocate and stir things up, 🙄 if we aren’t comfortable doing it in public, and title something “using discression” than should we be doing it to begin with? I think we’re all full of “sin” stuff regardless, but we are to also be conforming ourselves to the likeness of Christ in thought and deed.

  27. July 9, 2008 12:56 pm

    I agree with Mocha and JudiFree

    Words themselves are less important then the thought behind them. If we join a social group anywhere in the world, and we want to communicate effectively, we need the learn the language that the social group uses. In some groups we might say “darn” or “dam” or “F—“, which ever gets your point across the best.

    If we are in our 3rd traffic jam and that 4th guy cuts us off it makes no difference if we say, “Golly gee whiz” or F—. In both cases we will be swearing because the thought behind the words is exactly the same.

    The only real curse words to me are words said with hate behind them.

  28. July 9, 2008 12:59 pm

    yes. i remember there was a girl on the worship team at church who called and asked brent if she should/could wear a certain skirt while on team for that weekend. his response was…”if you have to question it – dont do it”.

    that can cover almost anything i suppose.

    and that is quite convicting. 😯

    now…do curse words cause me “question”? not all the time. it really depends, for me, how they are being used. honestly. its one of those things that really doesnt bother me when it is not to insult, put down or hurt another person.

  29. July 9, 2008 1:00 pm

    ed – awesome!!! and ANY word can be used with a hateful intent! perfect 😉

  30. July 9, 2008 1:03 pm

    I’d rather hear honk or shoot come out of Dylan’s mouth than the other.

    If my intent is to SWEAR with anger behind my words, then yeah, it’s been done. But just in my everyday mishaps, no, my heart behind it is not swearing.

    It comes down to personal preferrence apparently. I’d rather hear slang than the real deal. But I’ve also been known to slip, or even *gasp* swear on purpose! 😯

    I’m probably going to heck now. 😆 HA!!!

  31. July 9, 2008 1:14 pm

    after reading all of this…i’m going to have to stop talking…

  32. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 1:19 pm

    Tam: “if you have to question it – dont do it”.”

    Exactly. Especially around others, because even tho I know my intention, we always need to be aware of how it will effect someone else. I try not to, but I slip, just like every area in my walk. I’m sure an occasional sh*t is covered by the blood as well…

  33. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 1:20 pm

    Wow, 😯 that just plain didn’t come out right… 🙄

  34. July 9, 2008 1:22 pm

    My kids aren’t allowed (adults either) to say shoot, dang, darn, Oh my gosh, stupid, hate, dumb and I’m sure there are others. Sometimes my oldest slips, but they self correct now, which was my initial intent. That they would guard their mouths and speak life INTO people, instead of sucking life OUT OF people. Those words aren’t very encouraging.

    I don’t know that they’ve heard anything worse than crap. They probably wouldn’t even know it was a bad word if they heard one!

    Our swear words growing up were:
    Ding dong it
    Cheese & Rice

    I said it earlier that it doesn’t matter the word you use, it’s the intent behind it. My friend says “God bless America”…which I would never allow my children (or self) to say.

    Just don’t swear uncontrollabley, and then tell people “it’s just me, it’s who I am, I’m being authentic”…right Tam?

  35. July 9, 2008 1:22 pm

    Selena,

    I believe these verses speak to both slanderous words and cuss words.

    Read through proverbs and look how the tongue will get you in trouble in a bunch of situations.

    The verses are talking about anything that can come out of your moth that can cause, as Mocha says, you to hurt your message or your testimony of Christ.

    It is about the intent of what comes out of the mouth.

    I believe that what we think of as cuss words, are just not use full in any situation. I do my best to not even utter them. I just don’t think they ad anything of meaning.

    I believe these verses speak to both slanderous words and cuss words.

    Do I say things like dang it, darn and shucks and fuzzy bunnies?… Yep,and I may even let a carp (Yes I said Carp) or two slip now and then in frustration and anger. Have I slipped and said others in my life? Yeppers…

    If you want to get into a word study in the bible look up Scoopala (SP)…

  36. July 9, 2008 1:23 pm

    Man, interesting conversation. I don’t think there is much more I can add.

    I will say if it offends someone, I’ll try to refrain (meat offered to idols-Corinthians).

    Also, moral and ethical lines must be drawn. I know in our postmodern subjective mindset this is an irritating task, but without them, society falls apart. It may not be sinful to accelerate my vehicle to 120 mph on the interstate, especially at 3am when no one is around. But for the good of everyone, a line has been drawn at 65mph. There is a lot dangerous potential in speeding, and in curse words.

  37. July 9, 2008 1:24 pm

    Mandy…

    I can’t stand the word “Stupid” …

    Also the word “Hate”. My rule on that word you can not hate anything with heart, better yet just don’t hate anything.

  38. July 9, 2008 1:31 pm

    Hi Tam! I fonud your blog by cruising around on judifree’s blog. Seems like you have a great thing going on here! Come check out my “Kevlar beard” if you are ever bored…hah

    On topic: I try to abstain from swearing as a general social courtesy. Different people come from all backgrounds and cultures, so I need to be particular about my language so that I can best reach them. I do not, however, think that modern conception of swearing is biblical. In Matthew 12:36 it says:

    “But I say to you, every idle word that men speak, will be accounted for in the day of judgement”.

    This verse is commonly used in this debate. Here is the verse in full context:

    Matt. 12:33 ¶ “Either make the tree good, and its fruit good; or make the tree bad, and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit.
    Matt. 12:34 You brood of vipers! How can you speak good things, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.
    Matt. 12:35 The good person brings good things out of a good treasure, and the evil person brings evil things out of an evil treasure.
    Matt. 12:36 I tell you, on the day of judgment you will have to give an account for every careless word you utter;
    Matt. 12:37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

    The pharisees and priests, who Jesus was talking to here, were not the type of people to swear and curse. They prided themselves on their holiness. The Greek here means a word without thought given to it, or a word that accomplishes nothing. It is much more likely that Jesus is talking about the idle words of the pharisees who pretend to be holy but have missed the whole points because their hearts are evil, so their words will always be evil as well.

    Did you notice that he called them “brood of vipers”? In the ancient world, this was one of the worst things you could call someone (almost as bad as calling them dogs). So you can interpret the verse how you like, but if you go one way, then Jesus Himself technically sinned two verses prior.

    Like some of you have said, it’s a “heart” thing.

  39. July 9, 2008 1:35 pm

    Scubala is wrong I was close…

    Strong’s Number: 4657
    skuvbalon
    1. any refuse, as the excrement of animals, offscourings, rubbish, dregs
    1. of things worthless and detestable

    Php 3:8 (NIV) uses rubbish
    8What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ

    Php 3:8 (KJV) uses Dung
    Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ,

    So hey even Paul used words of unclean nature to get his point across…. 😉 But what was his intent?

  40. July 9, 2008 1:35 pm

    Hate is the absence of Love. Who wants to be know for speaking like that?

  41. July 9, 2008 1:37 pm

    In what instnace would it be hate? Is the “f” word in itself hateful, or the motivation behind it?

  42. July 9, 2008 1:40 pm

    Habit of cussing:

    1. When I am at work and forget to do something
    2. When someone gets me really angry and I can’t think intelligently.
    3. During traffic issues.
    4. When the credit card company calls 6 times a day…
    5. When I don’t have enough money for something…

    I guess I should be going to cussersanonymous….lol.

    So Tam, you like check email, and send them?:)

  43. July 9, 2008 1:41 pm

    the ” f” word….it doesn’t impy hate, I think most of the time, it implies frustration with something.

  44. July 9, 2008 1:42 pm

    jon – 😆 you’re safe here friend 😉

    debs – 😯 THAT was hilarious!

    mandy – right on! that whole authenticity thing 😉 youre so cute girl!!!

    ck – i guess this is my point…you dont use “cuss” words but will say dang it and such…with what intent? out of anger. is one worse or better than the other. or they just words, harmless in and of themselves – until the heart hurls them at something or someone? if i am upset at my son and yell “Dang it Kota!!!” would it be any different than me yelling, “Damn it Kota!!!”?

    nate – agreed! 🙂 it is also in Cor. “everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial” so…choose carefully…

    josh – thank you so much for hoppin in here!! awesome to have you join! and thank you for your input 😉

    “So you can interpret the verse how you like, but if you go one way, then Jesus Himself technically sinned two verses prior.”

    good point.

  45. July 9, 2008 1:44 pm

    josh – exactly – i think that is the important point here! i can turn any word into a word of hate if i wanted to, by intent alone. period.

  46. July 9, 2008 1:48 pm

    Wow Tam…this is quite the discussion. No swearing here. We also don’t let our kids use words like crap, stupid, hate, dumb, shut-up, etc. Just not so nice. We are to edify and lift others up not the opposite.

    I do however use…Dang it…sucks and “pisses me off” but, that’s not around my kids….I’d rather my almost two year old wasn’t walking around saying “dang it”. My 7 year old does say…”shesh”…which is more of a complaining word that we are trying to stop him from saying. Our littlest dude does copy him and has said..”shesh” a few times.

    It’s a testimony thing I think. I know no one wants to be judged by others but, others would assume certain things if they heard cussing coming out of your mouth all the time.

    Laughing to self……..I am. One day in class at our old church a guy said “hell of a” twice and you could see people gasping and smacking each other under the table. It was funny to me. You could just see what they were thinking.

    I have noticed a lot of peeps in the blog world use cuss words….I’ll admit it does bother me. I don’t think it necessary and there are lots of words out there to get your point across other than words considered “bad” by the world.

  47. July 9, 2008 1:50 pm

    I have also made sucks more fitting, because I use
    ” It sucketh a lot”
    whatev.

  48. July 9, 2008 1:52 pm

    But cussing is just one of the many things we are ” careful” not to do in a professional setting, or at church…
    why are we ” careful”?

  49. July 9, 2008 1:52 pm

    Thanks, Tam! It’s all a matter of social relevancy and the motives behind it. Honestly, this discussion has me thinking about a lot of the things I say in general. The idle, hateful, discouraging things that don’t involve “swear words”, but are much more destructive to this community we call “Christianity”. Those seem to be the little “foxes”

  50. July 9, 2008 1:56 pm

    ggjen 😉 (“ggjen” rolls off the tongue SO well!) you bring up another topic…why is it ok to say certain things at certain times in certain moments when certain people arent around? and im not asking just you…is a general question to anyone 🙂

    ang – “it sucketh a lot” thats funny! 😆

  51. July 9, 2008 2:19 pm

    Yea, my friend tries to remind me what century we live in…
    whatev.

  52. July 9, 2008 2:20 pm

    K, so I was going to email Tam because I hate it when I am like “look at me, look at me” but here’s the thing…I have been dealing with this whole cursing/swearing/cussing(hi Alece) since however long but not really out in public. It was like under my breath or behind my husbands back (whenever I wanted to disrespect him for whatever it was that I didn’t agree with him over) to make myself feel better…all the while hating myself for acting like a lunatic. Mostly these things happened while driving by myself and I would scream obscenities at whoever cut me off or wasn’t polite (imagine that) so anyways I have been fighting this “stop swearing thing” for years. YEARS. And finally two weeks ago God was like “are you really speaking like that? I can hear you” as I said whatever I said under my breath…and so I determined then and there that I was going to take my thoughts (and words) captive. I must have been extremely spiritual that day because I just started praying out loud and then because I determined not to swear, of course they started bubbling out…grrrr. So when they did, I prayed out loud and asked Christ to cover my words to make them Holy. I did this dance for about 3 days feeling so stupid. After about 30 go arounds the swear monsters must have gotten the hint because I am through. Done. Hasn’t been a problem. Yay. God is Fabulous. I know this probably sounds ridiculous…but that is my story and I am sticking to it.

  53. July 9, 2008 2:28 pm

    KA – it doesnt sound ridiculous at all. you have had a conviction in your spirit over this for some time now. you gave it up to Him and He honored the condition of your heart on this issue. I love it! it reminds me of what Nate referenced earlier about meat offered to idols. meat is just meat but to some it can be offensive. same with words (and the intent behind them) i respect your convictions, and you of course, and would never want to intentionally offend you. because you are just that cool in my eyes miss thang!

  54. July 9, 2008 2:30 pm

    That was a good thing Kristi…and probably speaks for all of us.
    Yet, we try hard not to admit it.

    Especially when I cuss in front of an older Christian….and realize not only am I being disrespectful as a Christian but to also an elder…
    my fiance told me the other day that I cuss in front of my parents…I didn’t even know I did that!

    Anyways, yea.

  55. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 2:42 pm

    “why is it ok to say certain things at certain times in certain moments when certain people arent around?”

    Tam, to me it’s not. Honestly, I am swayed at times by circumstance (how my day went, etc) and people. This has been convicting to me, and shown me something I need to work on, and make a stand with. We need to be the same “in secret” as we are in public…Like He doesn’t know anyway….

    Kristi A: Amen, and thank you for that…if it’s convicting for whatever reason, and for me as I stated it has been…it’s time for a change. 🙂

  56. July 9, 2008 2:45 pm

    “Skubelon!” Paul of Tarsus.

    I’m told this is the Greek word for shit. It is in the Greek version of the NT. Of course, we edit him so he appears more Christian.

  57. July 9, 2008 2:46 pm

    Brood of Vipers!

  58. July 9, 2008 2:56 pm

    1 Timothy 6:20 O Timothy! Guard what was committed to your trust, avoiding the profane and idle babblings and contradictions of what is falsely called knowledge—

  59. July 9, 2008 2:58 pm

    right deb – and i asked because im seeing a pattern here that people only say certain words but never in front of so and so or such and such. then…why at all? or…why hold back?

    ric – are you serious???

    selena – i can’t believe you just said ‘of’!

  60. July 9, 2008 2:58 pm

    So here’s a question:

    If this is an issue that is more of a personal conviction, then why do we present it as a universal Biblical truth? I just picture in my mind, a mechanic or fisherman who has lived the majority of his/her life in an environment where cussing is permissible. It is hard for that person to find acceptance in the church, when they feel judged by something as miniscule as cussing. How do we make everyone happy?

  61. July 9, 2008 3:00 pm

    Exactly Josh!

    Tam hehe 😆 of, of, of

  62. July 9, 2008 3:00 pm

    right joe – which could be anything, correct? gossip, slander… a naughty word, or ANY word said with ill intent. no? yes?

  63. July 9, 2008 3:02 pm

    josh – GREAT question!!!

    selena – 😆 you make me do happy dances 😀

  64. Deborah permalink
    July 9, 2008 3:06 pm

    Josh: “How do we make everyone happy?” I’m more concerned about what makes my Lord happy…..So, for me, I try to accept people where they are and let Him sort out the rest.

  65. July 9, 2008 3:11 pm

    That is a good stance to take, Deborah. Walking in love is more important than making sure someone adheres to one’s own personal worldview of society.

  66. July 9, 2008 3:16 pm

    Ric– Exactly, Paul’s intent here is? and it was the only time we find that word in his writings.

    Tam…I choose not to cuss, because I don’t think it adds anything.

    Expressing anger and frustration is natural.. But I would rather people here me say carp than sh*t, or fuzzy bunnies rather than the F word.

    I think the fact that we take words like Sh*t, damn and F**k and use them out of context of there original meaning is where the confusion lies.

    More later if I can…. Bath time for the boy..

  67. July 9, 2008 3:20 pm

    awww sh!t f@#%!…i missed the whole discussion.

  68. July 9, 2008 3:33 pm

    For years I judged people by what came out of their mouths. I made many enemies and didn’t really draw others to Christ with my judgemental attitude.

    I still don’t cuss, it’s just not a habit since I didn’t grow up with it. I now know it isn’t a heaven/hell issue. I do still think some things are much more respectful than others, and out of respect for others, I choose not to use words I’m concerned might offend unnecessarily.

    God takes us as we are and then begins the refining process…it is hard for me to think of God as having a potty mouth though…somehow it just doesn’t seem to fit.

    I’m not sure where it all fits into the fruit of the Spirit, but when I run down that list: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control…I’m not sure where rude words would apply.

  69. July 9, 2008 3:35 pm

    Bath time over….

    What I wanted to ad before the bath was.

    I know I am not explaining well my beliefs on this, and my Lord knows I am not perfect in this area nor will I ever be.

    Intention is the key, I just chose to go a step further and use other words than cuss words with my intended message even when I am alone. Of course with God I am never alone.

  70. July 9, 2008 3:37 pm

    Oh, and I meant to say, I choose not to cuss but I don’t condemn, anymore, those who do.

    I also choose to overeat, and would hope you wouldn’t condemn me for being overweight, not much self-control in that area of my life.

  71. July 9, 2008 3:37 pm

    Michelle,

    Very nicely put… I wish I could have come up with those words, 6 responses of mine ago…. Thanks.

  72. July 9, 2008 3:39 pm

    ck – and i respect that totally! 😉

    in all honesty here…99.9% of the time i curse…i do it purposely to make me laugh. no kidding. i am that disturbed ;?

    iman – and hello there my friend 🙂 you totally killed me with that one!

    michelle – right – i dont believe its a heaven/hell issue either. completely agree 😉

    i wouldn’t use the word like “fat” around some people because i know that would offend them. “fat” is not a curse word, but it is a word that might hurt another person. its a constant checks and balance in every/anything we do. again…it goes back to the hearts intent.

  73. July 9, 2008 3:39 pm

    Thanks, CK. 😉

  74. July 9, 2008 3:41 pm

    ck – no. i, personally, have ‘followed’ you all along. you added a great deal of wisdom and thought to this discussion. i wouldnt change a bit of that. very thought provoking friend. thank you!

    michelle – you hit it on the head with your last comment! awesome!

  75. July 9, 2008 3:42 pm

    comment #70 😉

  76. July 9, 2008 3:42 pm

    😀

  77. July 9, 2008 3:55 pm

    I love how the conversations go from hilarious to serious….that is very intelligent of all of us…
    and Tam, I hear ya…but I am a real good at spewing it all out when I am angry that it happens most of the time..
    I still can’t believe I cuss in front of my parents…

    I mean I remember mom made me take a bite out of soap when I was 11 for saying ‘shit’ in the garage…and why I did, who knows!

  78. July 9, 2008 3:58 pm

    I feel rebuked, and encouraged all at once..yes I read all the comments!

    Self control is not my strong quality, and I rarely cuss, but mostly because it seems to me to be the lack of a better vocabulary.. Also I do slip up from time to time, but I am not the bar room cussin’ fool I used to be..so I am in progress, and happy about that… 🙂

  79. July 9, 2008 3:59 pm

    Thanks Tam…

    I found it easier to express my opinion on”What makes a man a man” over on Brent’s site which was way more contriversial than this.

  80. July 9, 2008 4:10 pm

    “bar room cussin’ fool”

    hehehe! you’ve come a LONG way baby 😉

  81. July 9, 2008 4:20 pm

    Wow, this is fascinating conversation! I didn’t grow up around a lot of cussing, so I have also never developed that habit. Although things seem to change when I go on vacation in Mexico without children, then swear words seem to stumble out of my mouth, but never in anger. I think I am very sensitive to swear words said in anger, and am usually quite offended by them. I agree that it is a matter of where your heart is, and keeping in mind who your audience, and if it might cause them to stumble. I just don’t believe that God cares if I say “shit” when I am alone and stub my toe. Not that I do say that, but I don’t think He would care if I did.

    My question is, why do we type $h!t when everyone in there head reads it and says shit? Must be the same as saying dang instead of damn. ??

  82. July 9, 2008 4:27 pm

    “My question is, why do we type $h!t when everyone in there head reads it and says shit? Must be the same as saying dang instead of damn. ??”

    yup. exactly.

    so did Mexico make you curse? thats funny 😉

  83. July 9, 2008 4:36 pm

    I thought about that too. Should I type the real word out or type in the ! and it was out of not knowing how far I should take that on someone elses blog.

  84. July 9, 2008 4:38 pm

    Yes, in Mexico I curse, but only for the funny effect. Or maybe also to express the immense exhilaration of being there. I think it has to do with the mental change that happens when you leave all responsibilities at home.

  85. July 9, 2008 4:42 pm

    Strangely, I don’t even like my kids saying “what the”. They have NO IDEA what comes after “the”, but I know, and I don’t say it, and don’t want them saying anything close to it.
    Also, yesterday as I was helping my daughter brush her teeth, hubby walks by and says “what is all that crap on the mirror”, and I’m like “you mean STUFF on the mirror”. I think I am REALLY sensitive about what my kids hear, because I surely don’t want them repeating those things at Christian school *gasp* the HORROR!

  86. July 9, 2008 4:44 pm

    I’m sure this has already been said but I haven’t had the time to go through all the comments but what God put on my heart is that He is concerned with our hearts and so I can understand what Selena asked: is there much of a difference between saying a modified version of a curse word if the heart is experiencing bitterness and resentment?

    I personally have an issue with curse words. Maybe I associate it with showing God reverence? And honoring His Word: Using your mouth to share wisdom and truth. Using words to edify not tear down. Death and life are in the power of the tongue.

    Curse words don’t serve a purpose. It’s just as easy to learn how to respond differently to something unfortunate or unexpected: “oh no” “oh Lord” “aww man.”

    I won’t judge you if you cuss and personally, it is now that I can say, by the grace and ONLY the grace of God, that I have not said a curse word in a long time now. Could it happen? Absolutely. Am I perfect? Nope. But I am deliberate about not using them and believe it’s possible for any other believer too.

  87. July 9, 2008 4:45 pm

    [you = you in general not you = Tam :)]

  88. July 9, 2008 4:45 pm

    My favorite phrases are “holy crap” and “good lord”. I bet there is more stance for me going to hell than others using more common cuss words 🙂

    With that said, this is an awesome discussion! Great stuff to chew on!

  89. July 9, 2008 4:48 pm

    Good point Brent. I’m sure God takes more issue with someone saying “Oh my God” and “Good Lord”, but since these are not considered “curse” words they are much more socially acceptable.

  90. July 9, 2008 4:54 pm

    les – and i respect that about you. you are SO lovely!

    it all comes back down to the heart. the intent in which ANY word is used. because any word at all can tear someone down…not only curse words. and often times…curse words are not used in negative terms.

    look how pretty kiristen is 🙂

    hi B!!!

  91. July 9, 2008 5:06 pm

    So B, all those years with you guys must be where I picked up my usage of holy crap and good lord. 😆 hahaha!!

    I am queen of crap around here. 😯 Figuratively.
    Jake is the king. Literally.

    Good lord that didn’t come out right!

    ha! 😆

  92. July 9, 2008 5:14 pm

    “Jake is the king. Literally. ” Hahahahaha!!!!!

    Ya, sorry about the crap thing. I wasn’t a very good influence on you…

  93. July 9, 2008 5:51 pm

    MotherFarker!!! I missed the whole dang thing again!…that’s what i get for taking a fraggin’ nap…sorry Tam.

  94. July 9, 2008 6:13 pm

    brandy – its mandy’s fault 😯

    iman – you leave me speechless. just jump in and tell me how you REALLY feel 😉

  95. July 9, 2008 6:46 pm

    Hey… been working at my daughter’s house… almost there…

    Carl, Yeah Paul’s intent I think is to shock some believers out of legalism and into being Christian. Kind of Tony Campolo’s intent too. Oddly enough almost all modern translations edit out the cuss word OUT OF LEGALISM!?

    Which I find ironic.

    Tam, by now you know we’re serious. Philippians 3:8. Here’s where I first learned of Paul’s “slip”
    http://ricbooth.wordpress.com/2008/03/26/walking-the-dog/#comment-677

    *Credit b4dguy and Christian (sharpiron)

  96. July 9, 2008 7:03 pm

    yah. there’s irony here like flies on sh…

    well. YOU know!

  97. July 9, 2008 7:13 pm

    ok, ok…seriously, “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks”…so, i can say “flower blossom sunshine” but my heart is full of wrath, anger, malice and disdain in saying it then it’s no better than your run of the mill cuss word.
    it’s all about the issues of the heart…but then again, you can just tell me to shut the funk up!

  98. July 9, 2008 7:19 pm

    iman – that was beautiful. excuse…im a bit weepy…

  99. July 9, 2008 7:20 pm

    I am not sure what to say – :o| Mama and I try to do our best to use language that would please our Lord and Savior – If He was walking with me and I swore or used slang would he be offended by it? Oh that’s right, He does walk with me. There are bigger issues such as feeding children, but that doesn’t excuse us from the smaller issues. I want my speech to be pleasing to Christ – I think I know what He expects of me, and I think I know when I disappoint him. If you are questioning it – like Brent says, then don’t do it.

  100. July 9, 2008 7:43 pm

    I have a good friend who would put a sailor to shame with her mouth. It doesn’t bother me anymore. Although after hanging out with her, I find my mouth gets much more carried away than normal. I do find it annoying in movies when it is just there to raise the rating or shock value. And I suppose, as ridiculous as it sounds, there are words that seem worse than others.

    Right or wrong? I don’t see it as being a huge moral issue. But how beneficial is it? Not so much.

  101. July 9, 2008 7:49 pm

    Something that happened across my brain…

    What if we found other ways to express our frustrations? It seems that the general feeling here is the heart behind the word. If that’s true, then we all need to examine that a little deeper. Words are used to communicate, and so if we choose words that have become socially acceptable outside of our Christian values, then what are we really doing? Frustration and anger are normal human reactions. But aren’t we called to something different?

    I think for me, letting the Holy Spirit take root in me has sort of worked to erase those words from my vocabulary. My reactions now to situations where I would have used that language before are different.

    Then there is the issue of self control. Thats a big one. We all know those words are offensive. Even if they are not offensive to us, we know they are offensive to others, and you never know when you will be speaking in earshot of someone who might be offended. I think that it’s important to learn to exercise a level of self control and avoid that language. Just out of principal.

    That’s my 2 cents worth…and probably way more than i should have put in!

  102. July 9, 2008 8:02 pm

    I’m a little late to drop in on the convo here, Tam, but I agree with what Mocha said earlier.

    PREACH IT MOCHA!

  103. July 9, 2008 8:02 pm

    Lori – A girl I dated in high school had a father who had the filthiest mouth of anyone – everyone avoided him like the plague – except the pastor – the pastor thought he could lead this nasty old man to a relationship with Christ – yeah, you bet! Well he did – that was 1963 or so -that man has never used foul language to this date! He wants to please his master – he is a true saint of Christ. That should really be our focus – what we think pleases christ and do our best not to offend others with our language. I like your comment.

  104. July 9, 2008 8:08 pm

    Thanks, Papa!

    Your story is just another example of the work the Holy Spirit can do in this area of our lives…if we let Him. I gave Him everything…well almost…still working on the hard stuff!

  105. July 9, 2008 9:07 pm

    Who made up those words anyways and said they were “cuss words?”

    We could all make up our own….would that make us bad?

    It is how we speak to one another….how we lift eachother up with our words, or not. We could easily tear eachother down without cuss words, don’t you think?

    To me, I define profanity as ugliness…any angry motive in which we use ANY words to tear, hash, or break another. It has nothing to do with the actual spelling of the word.

  106. Heidi permalink
    July 9, 2008 10:25 pm

    WOW.. I missed a conversation today.. Well it’s 10:16 and I just got home from work and came home to a messy house and a cold dinner and million lights on. Oh yea I wanna say @#*&%$#(, But I am too pooped to say sh….!

    Okay. My belief is that if you say it .. you say it.. move on.
    If you are slandering, tearing down and over ridiculing someone.. then check yourself into the Betty Ford clinic of cussing. Excuse the pun. I’m tired.

    I can cuss like the mighty sailor, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love Jesus. It just means that I have a soul and flesh that I need to give up everyday… because I aint perfect.. God is not going to fall off the throne when I say Holy crud or sh… or even a da… or too. It’s where those words are resonating where He cares. If I “check” my heart everyday than just maybe I would cuss less..

    For me that works or as my grammy said. “the proof is in the pudding”

  107. July 9, 2008 10:38 pm

    I always just think about this verse
    Eph 4: 29Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

    Lord help us all…I am so reminded of Isa chapter 6 we are a people of unclean lips and live among a people of unclean lips and oh that we would see the LORD Almighty and that He would refine us and our tongues.

  108. July 10, 2008 1:03 am

    I just love you Jen, you have such a tender heart for Jesus:)

    Of course that was the verse sent this morning…ugh:)

  109. July 10, 2008 7:56 am

    What is unwholesome talk? I think the following sentance is quite wholesome and edifying: “John, you are a hell of a cook, that food was f*cking good!”

    It seems like the general conscensus is to say that swearing is bad, but shouldn’t be focused on. I personally haven’t seen any evidence that it is Biblically wrong, and I don’t think it should be given any thought at all.

  110. July 10, 2008 8:19 am

    Tam:
    I curse to make myself laugh, too.
    Haha.

  111. July 10, 2008 12:08 pm

    Once again, I’m very late to the party but here is my take:

    If my intent is to be a man after God’s own heart then swearing has no place in my vocabulary. I personally feel that swearing does not honor God. There’s just no good reason for speaking that way, angry or not, and to think otherwise is compromising ourselves to the crassness and vulgarity that permeates our society. 40 years ago, dropping an F-bomb would have been scandalous and now it is the norm. I think it comes down to an individual decision regarding what kind of witness we want to be to those around us. I simply cannot imagine what it would have done to Jesus’ ministry had he walked into the temple, saw the moneychangers there, and in his fury yelled “What the hell?! This is my father’s house! Pack up your s**t and get the f**k outta here!”

    Hey, you asked! 🙂

  112. July 10, 2008 12:43 pm

    there’s some cursing action over on the waxy one’s page today…

  113. July 21, 2008 7:22 am

    “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this persons religion is worthless” James 1:26

    The sign of an unconquered and unconverted heart is an unbridled tongue.

  114. August 1, 2008 1:28 pm

    Hey everyone,

    I found this page while doing research about this very topic… what does the Bible say about cussing, cursing and swearing?

    Well I’ve gathered as many verses that I can find… including some from this article.

    I’ve posted them in an article on my website along with further words to show that this isn’t acceptable by Christ.

    I would just post it but I use a Bible Database that I get the verses from… makes it much easier to post articles with many verses in them.

    Either way, I pray you take a moment to view the article and hopefully the Spirit will guide you into doing what is right and holy before our merciful and gracious God.

    God bless you all,
    Johnathan

    Website: http://www.agodblessedman.com
    Article in question: http://www.agodblessedman.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=162:setting-a-christian-example&catid=12:ramblings-of-a-blessed-man&Itemid=51

Trackbacks

  1. You’re called to be Holy…. « Godsgal
  2. You are called to Holiness….. « Godsgal
  3. which is worse? « inProgress
  4. 2009 best posts – a re-post on cussing « inProgress

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