“Now speak”

i remember one of the first times i shared my testimony to a group of people. it was for a youth event of about 150 or so high school students and adults. i had spent several weeks prior putting down my words how i best saw them fit to be shared. i know it’s a powerful testimony and was trying to be sensitive to its content.

when the event came i was a nervous wreck. i had spoken to groups before – but for some reason, this one shook me up. i brought my stack of note cards with me and sat in the front of the building, all alone, flipping through each one in attempt to remember each and every little detail and the order in which i desired to share it. then from the end of the long hall way i heard my name called. it was time. it was time to stand bare in front of 150 people. i can do this. and off i went.

i got to the double doors and realized i had left my note cards in the front office. i turned back to get them. a lady stops me to ask what i was doing. i told her, but she said there was no time. i explained that i needed those cards. my notes, my thoughts, everything i needed was on those, i have to have them. she put her hands on my shoulders and held me there. staring intensely into my eyes, she said, “tam, you don’t need those cards. you need to walk up there equipped with your testimony and the power of God within you. that is all you need. He will ensure what needs to be said will be said. you just go on up there and let Him do the rest.”

😯

off i went. walking up the center aisle trying desperately to recall any peace of info. i had jotted down. nothing. not a thing came to mind. i get to the stage, take a deep breath and i turn around. 300 eyeballs staring back at me. complete silence. then…He gives me a vision. every face in that room somehow becomes one. one beautiful face cupped in the hands of God. i saw His hands around all their faces as He prepared them for what they were about to hear. then He cupped mine and said, “now speak”.

i don’t remember much of what i said. but i do recall well the hours i spent afterward praying with young girls, boys and adults. and it was as it was suppose to be. me, out of the way.

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