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a message from Kassidi

September 25, 2008

this is tam. kass and i had a wonderful talk tonight. i love that we can communicate. i love that she came to me with this. i love that we trust each other, and pray that will always continue. we, brent and i, should always be her safe place to land.

it takes a village to raise a child. and in this case…a blogging community. all your comments to the last post were amazing. thank you so much! i can safely say that we, and the Grandparents, definitely agree with your advice.

so below is a note from kassidi….

Hey everyone, this is Kass. I just want to thank you for the advise in your comments on my mom’s last post. It has really helped a lot!!! This is what we have come up with. Well, as you might’ve guessed, my mom obviously said no. She told me why and I back her up on it 110%.

Here is our plan:

I (and we) believe that I don’t need to be in a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship. Being b-friend and g-friend is preparing you for marriage and I’m not ready for that yet. I (and we) think that ANYONE in my age group isn’t ready for that. I think that maybe having him come to church with my fam every once in a while would definitely be better.

20 Comments leave one →
  1. September 25, 2008 6:36 pm

    Hi Kass – Love you!! We can still have a talk – papa is a good listener. Might even have a comment or two. See ya soon – and – be sure to ask mama about the “doll story”.

  2. Heidi permalink
    September 25, 2008 6:45 pm


    This was an awesome decision.

    You have great examples and I am glad you already see that..
    Because that’s the biggest battle in trusting in US parents.
    It’s awesome that you chose God and yourself first than dating.

  3. September 25, 2008 7:46 pm

    That’s wonderful that you have a great relationship. That is my hope and plan for my girls.

    And, Tam, sounds like you have a smart, godly girl!

  4. September 25, 2008 7:57 pm

    I’m so proud!!!

    HEY KASS!!! YOU ROCK!!!! WOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. September 25, 2008 8:02 pm

    You know, Kass… I’m one of those people who didn’t rush into boys and dating. My parents taught me that by waiting, I was being faithful to my husband – I just hadn’t met him yet. And looking back I don’t have any regrets. I’m proud of you for making good decisions early in life. I hope you’re proud of yourself too.


  6. September 25, 2008 8:04 pm

    Kass, big kudos to you.

    Keep your heart guarded and use your head and you’ll do fine! And always remember, even if you don’t agree with everything mom and dad ask you to do or not do, they do because they love you and want what’s best for you NOW and for your future!!

    God’s Best!

    P.S. If you fix your hair like this you won’t ever ave to worry about dating.

  7. September 25, 2008 8:08 pm

    Wow I hope my relationship with my kids is just that solid. More than anything I just want to be able to talk and have a relationship so that when issues come then we can walk through them together.

  8. refinedfire permalink
    September 25, 2008 8:10 pm

    yeah, go Kass! i’ll be praying for you thru these years, which aren’t the easiest years of your life, lol. i’m 20, and tho lots of my friends are guys, God’s been amazing to provide protection from my parents, and the great guys they are, to shield me from anything that could harm me or anyone…. and i’ve had lots of fun with them.

  9. September 25, 2008 8:13 pm

    tam. you. rock!!! kass you are the sweetest! and so SMART.

    i went on my first date when i was 13! that nite was the beginning of a disastrous relationship. finding that balance in communicating these kinds of subjs w/ your girls can be tricky. you two have an awesome mother/daughter relationship! oh my goodness i have tears. thanks for sharing it!

  10. September 25, 2008 8:42 pm

    Good plan and I will start praying for you in this particular area in your life. I know that when you are ready you will be an awesome friend and encouragment to your boyfriend and it will rock. Yay for love and yay for looking forward to it and yay for trusting your parents judgement because for reals, they have your very best interest at heart and if you let them…they will help you in many many ways beyond what you can even imagine. That may not make sense now…but I thought I “knew it all” when I was 15ish and I blew my parents off and seriously, it was a huge mistake. I really missed out on so much. I think your family rocks and I am so glad you are allowing them to love you in this way. You are FABULOUS!!!

  11. September 25, 2008 11:52 pm

    i believe being gf/bf CAN prepare you for marriage… i believe it DOES allow each of you to better understand what being a member of the ‘opposite’ sex is all about and in that way helps prepare you to be a much better ’rounded’ human being, provide you both understand that any ONE individual is NOT representative of the entire other sex in every single detail (not all men are going to be like your ‘first’ boyfriend).

    If it is what you WANT though – i hope your first becomes your only and is ALL you could ever wish for in a partner.) 🙂 ( Maybe if i had a son….???) 😉

    Good luck Kass. (listen to your Mom and Dad (mostly your Mom! 😉 )

    i know you are going to make HIM proud! – and your parents will do their best to guide you in that – if you ever have questions or any ‘uncertainty’ they will be there for you.


  12. September 26, 2008 4:57 am

    Kass – I have 3 daughters & hope that when the time for dating comes…maybe they’ll come to me. Maybe they’ll look into the Bible to see what God wants for them. Your parents are amazing….looks like they’ve passed that along to you too!!!

  13. September 26, 2008 5:57 am

    ‘ve been thinking about your family all week. Your relationship with your parents is rare. It’s a treasure – a blessing that most never have. I’m not saying that you don’t appreciate or value them, but the next few years will be time to start pulling away – as you enter into young adulthood full force. Don’t pull away too far. They are a hedge of protection for you. Continue to value and trust them and communicate with them, even as you learn to make your own decisions in the right times. You, my dear dear young friend, have been given SUCH a gift in them. SUCH a gift. Treasure it. Be wise, as you already so clearly are.

  14. Heidi permalink
    September 26, 2008 6:29 am


    Wow … Mandy just spoke right out of my heart.
    Kass, listen to EVERY word from Mandy up there.
    Truly spoken from love.

  15. September 26, 2008 7:12 am

    oh thank you Jesus. 😀

  16. September 26, 2008 10:19 am

    Geezzz, I wish I was that smart. Great kid! Great mama!

  17. HeatherB permalink
    September 26, 2008 12:33 pm

    Kass- you sound like a girl who is wise beyond your years! I hope my daughter will feel so safe and trusting with me and her daddy when she hits your age! I pray for continued wisdom in your relationships!

    Tam- great “mamma-ing”

  18. September 27, 2008 5:41 am

    Kass, I love your plan. You are such a beautiful, smart, and talented young women. The boyfriend/girlfriend season of life will come in time, but don’t rush it… enjoy the friendships you have with guys, girls, your parents, etc – they’re priceless!

  19. September 28, 2008 2:50 pm

    Hey Kassidi –

    Let me say that it is AWESOME that you have such a great relationship with your mom. I know that you probably won’t realize how special it is until later in life (I think that happens with everyone), but treasure the moments. You only get this day once.

  20. September 29, 2008 1:20 pm

    kass, i know you don’t me, but i am so proud of you. most of all, i’m proud of you and your mom for forging such an open relationship with each other. what you have is so unique. so rare. a true gem. something i’ve never experienced… don’t lose that.

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