A Beautiful Mess

It was a small function of women at my church and I was to give a brief testimony. I chose to speak on the abortions. Trust me, there are plenty other things I could’ve chosen – but my Spirit confirmed in me what needed to be said.

The usual greetings and fellowship took place. To be quite honest with you…I’m not wasn’t a big fan of women. So to be in a room with no guys was a bit awkward for me.

It came time for me to walk on stage to speak. There I stood, gathering my notes, making small talk with the front row. Making eye contact with the ones I knew well, those would become my comfort markers if a knee shaking, nauseating moment happened to arrive.

I began telling my story when a tall, beautiful woman walked through the back doors. She caught my eye immediately. So striking. As she made her way to the front row to join her friend, I noticed she never lifted her head. Her shoulders slumped a bit to suggest she really didn’t want to be there. I thought…what a good thing this is a free event!

I didn’t speak for too long. Twenty minutes at most. The MC came up afterwards, gave me a rose and prayed for us all before we left. As I made my way off stage I noticed the young woman was gone.

Two weeks later on a Sunday morning I am at church getting ready to join the Music Team for the beginning of the service when I see her, the beautiful girl. She came right up to me and asked if we could meet. Of course I say yes. I gave her my number then headed for the stage.

A week passed. No call. A second week passed. Still, no call. Finally, I saw her in church again and got her number this time and set up a time right then to meet.

The day came. It was a Tuesday morning. She came over to my home. It was nice to finally sit and talk with her. There was something about her from the first time I saw her that I was drawn to. She sat there, nervous and figity. She began telling me her story. Not so unlike my own. Only, she was currently pregnant. She was engaged with the wedding still months away. Her marriage would give her already little girl a daddy, for which she was very grateful for. But this baby inside her…she didn’t want. She didn’t want to make the same mistake again of having another baby out of wedlock. A baby she didn’t want nor was ready for. Her fiancé wanted the baby. He wanted it very much.

She told me she wanted an abortion. She just didn’t want another child right then. Not that way. She asked for my advice. I didn’t have to say much. I told her the fact that her seeking me out and meeting that day she already knew what she needed to do. All I would do is confirm that with her – all she had to do was make the right decision with her heart and mind. After many, many tears and lots of what ifs, she asked if she could use my phone. In fact, there was a little panic in her request as she looked at her watch. She hurriedly dialed a number as I sat there. A few moments later she gave her name and said she is suppose to be there in an hour, then asked if they would cancel her appt….”No”, she replied, “I don’t need to reschedule”.

She handed me the phone and said, “I was going to abort my baby at 11:30 today.” “No you weren’t”, I said to her…”I think you had already made the right decision before you came here…you just needed a little confirmation.”

We sat and cried for quite awhile. Rejoicing over the life that was saved. If angels rejoice in Heaven over saved souls – then I’d like to think there was a big celebration happening that day!

Not everyone feels it necessary to be an open book. But moments like these are why I feel I HAVE to be an open book! There is no option for me to be otherwise. A life was saved that day. NOT because of me – but by the redemptive power of the One who saved me. I cannot, will not, keep that to myself…